Before you begin a conversation with your child about vaping, watch this short video to learn about some of the health impacts you should be aware of.  Know that 2024 vaping prevalence data shows 9.6% of eighth graders, 15.4% of 10th graders and 21% of 12th graders reported vaping nicotine in the past month.

Essential Tips: How to Talk So Your Teen Will Listen

When you have the facts on vaping, the next step is talking to your child. The key is to keep the conversation open, trusting, and judgment-free. Use these principles, adopted from best practices in youth engagement, to ensure your message gets through.

 

Ditch the Scare Tactics—Focus on Facts and Personal Goals

Avoid dramatic warnings. Instead, connect vaping to things they value right now. Talk about how nicotine addiction affects their memory, attention, sleep, sports performance, or anxiety—consequences that feel immediate and personal.

 

Lead with Honesty and Open-Ended Questions

Make it a two-way conversation. Begin by stating clearly that you are asking from a place of love and concern.

 

Be Mindful of Body Language and Tone

Choose a casual time and place, like a car ride or while cooking. Keep your body language open (uncrossed arms, relaxed posture). Maintain gentle eye contact and use nonverbal nods to show you are truly engaged. Calmness builds trust.

 

Listen First—Then Listen Some More

Practice silence. Let your child finish their thoughts without interruption. Do not react emotionally or correct them right away. Giving them the space and time to speak shows that you value their perspective more than your desire to lecture.

 

Still not sure how to start the conversation?

Use these six flexible conversation starters. They are designed to gently uncover your child’s perspective and correct common myths. Don’t worry about following them in order or using all six. Just choose the ones that feel right and follow the flow of your conversation.

 

“I saw a recent poll that showed fewer teens are actually vaping than most kids think. What’s the real vibe at school? Do you feel pressure to try it, or is that mostly just what you see on social media?”

• • Goal: Corrects the misconception that “everyone is doing it,” which is a major driver of youth use. Opens the door to discussing refusal skills.

 

“Vapes are designed with those super-sweet flavors like Gummy Bear and Mango. Honestly, what’s the appeal of those flavors to kids your age, and why do you think companies spend so much money on them?”

 

• • Goal: Acknowledges the appeal without judgment. Shifts the blame to the manipulative marketing of the tobacco industry (“Blame Big Tobacco, not your kid”).

 

“If someone told you their vape was ‘nicotine-free’ or ‘just water vapor,’ what would you say to them? I’m asking because I just learned that two-thirds of teens don’t realize vapes contain addictive nicotine. What have you heard about that?”

 

• • Goal: Allows the teen to voice misinformation they’ve heard and gives the parent a low-pressure way to deliver a key fact about addiction.

 

“I know you take your [Sports/Grades/Music] seriously. I recently read that nicotine addiction can damage the parts of your brain that control focus and memory. How could vaping get in the way of what you want to achieve this year?”

 

• • Goal: Connects the abstract health risk to the teen’s personal goals and future, making the consequences tangible and relatable.

 

“A lot of teens say they try vaping to deal with stress or anxiety. What are the best ways you and your friends can deal with the pressure from school or social life? Because I want to make sure you have better ways to cope than relying on a chemical.”

 

• • Goal: Validates the stress and anxiety many teens feel while steering the conversation toward healthy coping strategies and away from substance use.

 

“We both know your memory and focus are critical for [Specific Class/Test]. I read that the nicotine in vapes can disrupt the brain circuits that control attention and learning in teens. Have you or your friends noticed any difference in how well you can concentrate after using a vape?”

 

• • Goal: Emphasizes the direct link between nicotine and core brain functions essential for school success. It encourages the teen to reflect on real-world, daily consequences rather than just long-term health risks.

 

Every conversation counts. Even if your teen seems uninterested or defensive at first, your calm, consistent approach plants seeds that matter. Keep showing up with curiosity, honesty, and care. When your child knows you’re a safe space—not a source of judgment—they’re far more likely to listen, reflect, and make healthy choices about vaping and beyond.